


For Forever (reprise)

by Overturned_Decent



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Canon Compliant, Kinda, Song fic, also i love posting stuff, but I'm posting it now bc its short complete and i still like it, connors kind of a jerk, for forever reprise, he's major rubbing salt in the wound, i guess, i wrote this waaaaay back in may '17, major character death is connor since he's already dead, the same place for forever reprise takes place in the musical, this take place right after good for you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-26
Updated: 2018-01-26
Packaged: 2019-03-09 12:59:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13481979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Overturned_Decent/pseuds/Overturned_Decent
Summary: End of May or early June...





	For Forever (reprise)

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this way back in May '17, but I'm posting it now because i want to, and also because i like it. that is all

Evan dug his fingernails into his sweaty palms.  _ That's right Evan...breath..breath _ ….. yeah no. That wasn't happening. 

 

_ “Is that good for you? Would that be damn good for you, Evan?”  _ Evan blinked his eyes, trying to stop the flood of tears that he knew was coming, coming, coming. 

 

_ “I could tell everyone, EVERYTHING.”  _ No no, stop stop. The intrusive thoughts kept coming.

 

_ “Go ahead, cut me off, Evan. Who needs that stupid smart girl to help out? I mean, she is only doing it for college, eh?” _ Oh, god, how could he do this? How does one person mess up  _ this _ badly? Evan pounded his fists in his eyes, trying to stop, stop, stop the tears which had begun spilling through. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly,  _ count one, two three, inhale, hold one two three four five, exhale on one two three four five six seven, pause, one two three, inhale….. _

 

He wasn't sure how much time had passed, but glancing around, he saw he was no longer alone. 

 

“You can't even tell yourself the truth.” It wasn't posed as a question, it never was.

 

“What are you talking about?” Evan muttered, getting up from his position on the ground to face Connor. Er, well, Connor’s  _ ghost _ , more like. 

 

“How’d you break your arm?” Connor’s face was expressionless. His arms were crossed over his body, but in a more confident way than how Evan was currently stood with crossed arms. Evan refused to look at him, body rigid, and tense. 

 

Connor’s eyes narrowed, and he repeated, “How’d you break your arm, Evan?”

 

“I fell.” Evan snapped, sharply, turning to glare at him. 

 

“Oh, really, is that what happened?”

 

“YES.” Evan shouted, face heating up in anger. He glared even harder, as if maybe, that might make him  _ go away _ . 

 

Connor didn't flinch, his gaze trained on Evan. Evan blinked nervously, deflating. 

 

“I was-- I lost my grip, and then I just- I fell, so,”  he trailed off, shooting a look at Connor before dropping it to the ground. He tightened his grip on his arms, shrinking in on himself, trying to get away, trying to disappear from Connor’s disapproving look. 

 

“.... _ did _ you fall?” Connor said slowly, “Or did you  _ let go _ ?” He took a step towards Evan, causing him to stumble back slightly. Connor ignored that, moving forward again. 

 

“You can get rid of me, whenever you want.” Evan tried to ignore him. 

 

“You can get rid of,” he gestured around, “all of it.” Evan turned away, staring directly at a picture frame on the wall. It was of him and his mom. 

 

“The ‘Connor Project’, the orchard..” It looked like he was about nine in the photo. His mom looked tired.

 

“But then all that you're going to be left with-” Connor’s voice grew louder. “Is you.” It got quiet. So quiet, Evan could hear the beats of silence, in between his shuddery breaths, was silence. The silence where Connor’s breathing would be-  _ should be _ . 

 

The floorboards made no sound as Connor closed the distance between he and Evan, he slung an arm across his shoulder, causing Evan to instantly tense up. He did  **not** want Connor near him. No. 

 

“End of May or early June….” he said softly. Evan squeezed his eyes shut, not wanting to look, not wanting to see. That didn't last long.

 

“Open your eyes, Hansen. This is your ‘perfect world’, why are you so embarrassed to not be the only one in it? Now how did that go again?” Evan opened his eyes, tears springing up. 

 

“This picture perfect afternoon...we shared. Funny, I don't seem to remember that. What happened exactly, Evan? You know, surely.”

 

“Stop it.” Evan tried to make his voice strong, but the words fell out of his mouth limply. 

 

“ _ Stop it _ .” Connor mocked. “Stop what, exactly? These are your own words, Evan. I know. I was there, you know I was there.” Evan didn't reply. He pulled away from Connor, and stumbled to his bed, pulling a pillow onto his lap as a security item. Connor ignored his distress and sat down next to him, the bed not changing shape by him at all. Up close, Evan remembered, Connor was slightly translucent. 

 

“Drive the winding country road, grab a scoop at  A La Mode and then we’re there.” 

 

“Stop it, Connor.” Connor smirked at him

 

“Whatever you say, Your Highness.” Evan flinched. Connor stood up off the bed and crossed to the door.

 

He turned to Evan and called, “Think about it.” He pulled the door open, stepped out, and let it swing shut behind him with a sharp  _ clang. _

 

And now Evan was left alone.  _ Just like he wanted.  _

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> my tumbler is @overcast-skies , chat me up there.


End file.
